I got a phone call from Youth Villages the other day asking me to come in and interview for a position in their research department. I am beyond excited because I am IN LOVE with Youth Villages and everything they stand for. I’m passionate about children, and seeing them live successfully with their families is indescribably rewarding.
During college, I did four internships with YV and anxiously awaited the day I would have a full time position. But life happened. Between Andy’s arrival and moving to Texas, I haven’t had the opportunity to be involved with them since my last internship.
The most exciting thing about the position I’m being considered for is it’s part-time. I’m really reluctant to leave my babies, so that’s a major benefit. Being a part-time position at a nonprofit organization, the pay is practically nonexistent. More than likely, once we pay the childcare expenses we incur, we’ll be bringing in the exact same amount of money we are today. Basically, if I were to take this on, it would be solely for the personal satisfaction that comes with working for an organization you believe in. I have no problem with that because I love Youth Villages that much. I would volunteer my time to mop their floors if it meant it would benefit the children in direct care.
Anyway, what it boils down to is I have to chose between my babies and this job. I know that’s sounds a little dramatic, but that’s what it feels like. When I consider the list of pros and cons there’s really only one of each.
Pro: I’d be working at further improving an organization that already does a stellar job of improving children’s lives.
Con: I’d be missing precious moments with the boys.
When I was working Texas, leaving Andy was the worst part of my day. Now that I’m home with Jack, I see how many little moments I truly did miss with him. I feel like I cheated Andy and myself out of time we could have been spending together.
I have every intention of pursuing a masters degree and going back to work one day. I’m just not sure if one day should be today.
I hadn’t intended on going back to work until Jack went to kindergarten. I’m not worried about the care they’d be receiving in my absence. I feel like we have some good childcare options and for the first 4-6 weeks Josh’s mom will be keeping them. I just don’t know if I’m ready to give up all of those little moments that make my heart smile. I have until Thursday to decide. What’s a mom to do….