This just isn’t working out. It’s not me, it’s you. I need you to pack your things and move out immediately. I just can’t waste any more time with you.
I can’t say that it hasn’t been fun, but that’s just not good enough anymore. Please don’t make a scene, or conjure up all kinds of ideas of things we can to do together. This really has to end. Now. Besides, I’ve met someone else. His name is Productivity. Granted, he and I don’t seem to fit together as naturally as you and I do, but I’m determined to make it work. He can take me places you can’t. It’s as simple as that.
I’m sorry to be so harsh, but I don’t see another way. I’ve tried to drop hints and show you how we’re growing apart, but nothing seemed to be working. It just has to end. And I felt like you need to know exactly why.
I’ll certainly look back on the time we spent together fondly, but I’m looking forward to getting to the point where I don’t miss you anymore. I’ll be better off without you. I know I will. I just need you to accept this and move on. You’ll find someone else. Someone better suited for your romping. We’ll both be better off; you’ll see.
The time we’re spending together is in vain, as I’m just growing resentful. When we part, I’m left feeling angry and even used. I just can’t do it anymore. I don’t care if you don’t understand. This is the way it has to be.
Please try and forget we ever knew each other so intimately. I’m not looking back and I won’t change my mind. Starting now, I’m moving on. Really. I am. Yes, it’s hard for me to walk away. But I just have to be strong. I can get past you. I will. I’m done. I’m not falling for you again. Forget moving out of my life. I’ll leave. I’ll be better off for it, you’ll see. Years from now, when we meet again, you’ll hardly know me, and you’ll be exactly as I left you. That’s why it has to happen now. Goodbye, Procrastination. I’m leaving now. Like Fergie said, “Big girls don’t cry.”