Last night, I read an article that I absolutely loved. It was like the author had known me all my life and was writing specifically about me, only made it sound general, like it applied to other people too. It was kind of neat to read something that was so spot on, but it was also kind of disheartening. So much for being wholly unique. Obviously, I’m more than just what this article observes, and I realize that is where my uniqueness comes in, but I was flabbergasted at the degree of accuracy to which these generalities applied to me. There was not one piece of the article that did not apply to me at least somewhat, but the majority of it (like 99% of it), I was like, “Oh my gosh! Yes! That is so me!” So, without further ado, if you want to understand my world (or are just completely bored), I give you…
(Click text above to link to article.)
Now, next time you run in to me, and I get all squirmy when we start talking about the weather, you won’t have to worry whether you have bad breath or if maybe I have to pee really badly or something. You’ll just know that that’s just me in all of my awkward glory.
And, no, I don’t screen your calls because I’m mad at you. The way I see things, you just jumped into my kitchen out of nowhere, and that’s a little much for me to take. I’ll call you back when I’m mentally prepared to do so. (I know, I’m such a weirdo! But I’m so relived to know that my “weirdness” has a source!)
By the way, I’m quite surprised to learn about this whole internal monologue thing. You mean everyone doesn’t have that? Fascinating…I never knew.
Also, I’m so glad to know that its not simply immaturity that makes me want to communicate exclusively by email. I’m simply aware that I communicate much better in writing than I do with real words. It’s not that I’m a product of some technological generation. If I were born centuries ago, I think I would have had to invest in a personal courier. Or become a hermit.
However, I have been asked to give talks from time to time. In fact, it was kind of a crucial component of my most recent job. I take no issue with that. In fact, I think I’m quite good at it. But talking at a bunch of strangers from the front of the room or the safety of the stage is much different than talking to them after. Also, it’s likely that I’m talking about something I consider important instead of just nonsense. This is why, if you ever see me give a talk, I desperately try to enter the room as close to the beginning of the talk as I can, and escape as quickly after.
Interestingly, despite my fears, when I do get caught after, it’s usually not awkward at all. And now I know why. It’s not random small talk. It’s usually about the content of whatever I just said. And I can deal with that.
I’m seriously considering deleting my entire “about me” page and posting in the contents of this article. What can I say? I’ve been pegged.
Hello! My name is Mary, and I’m an introvert.
My world makes so much more sense now.